The saga of Barold

Anyone who's played an Animal Crossing game knows that you can't choose your townspeople. Some of them are cool, like that penguin who calls me ladybro. Some of them are less than cool.

And some of them are Barold.

I was rudely introduced to Barold when he built his house in my town, right in the middle of the mayoral rose garden. So if, for example, I was trying to get a picture of myself wearing Majora's Mask with the moon in the background:

NOW TO DROP IT ON EVERYONE AND END THE WORLD MUAHAHA

I now had to deal with this stupid eyesore:

Barold's house. He stacked a bunch of cinder blocks outside like a homeless person.

I was polite about Barold's faux pas, at first. I sent him some official mayoral letters, trying to drop hints.

"Dear Barold: I can't help but notice that your hideous cinder block house is still lowering my property values. From [Me]"

This is the reply I got:

"For [Me]: I'm coloring in all the vowels in your letter. It's fun! I tried putting the letter you sent me under my pillow, but so far... no sweet dreams. Well, that's all for today. Your pal, Barold"

Now thoroughly convinced that Barold was a serial killer, I went to visit him at his home.

Barold's house. It's creepy. Trust me on this one.

Barold had no real furniture. He had a server, laptop, and copy machine, probably all used for porn distribution. He slept in a sleeping bag on the floor. And, worst of all:

A picture of Barold's house from the opposite angle.

I'm pretty sure that giant stuffed bear used to be one of his family members.

I eventually got Barold to leave Balsaq, but not before he got fleas and spread them to everyone else in town. When he told me he was finally leaving, my natural politeness kicked in, and I chose the "Oh nooo, that's so saaaad!" option.

"Well, if you feel that strongly about it, I guess I'll stay," he said cheerfully.

Then I reset the game without saving, sat through a lecture from Mr. Resetti, and told that bum to get out of town.

And now Balsaq is great and flea-free again.